What Might Have Been
by Allana78
Summary: My Story starts at the end of Angel as in the very last episode Not Fade Away Some things have came right out of it with some changes to fit my story and it continues from there. I have planned angst but may change as the story goes on.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter one 

**Author's Notes: As I have already mentioned specialy for the first couple chapters quite a bit of the dialog is stolen straight from some real episodes. Only slightly changed to fit this story. Please bare with me as I get us into my actual story. Thanks!**

"BUFFY CAN YOU TOSS ME A TOWEL?" Dawn yelled from the bathroom. Sighing to herself Buffy stood up leaving her homework and heading to the hall closet, then to the bathroom.

"Think maybe just possibly next time you could remember to grab one yourself before getting in the shower?" Buffy said not waiting for a answer and heading back to her homework. Laughing to herself as she wondered what exactly possessed her to go to school while in Rome should she be using all her time to party, see the sites, after all she knew when she came here she had no intention of staying here. Slowly lowering herself down in her chair she stared at her work. She always knew she had to go back sometime and that she really wasn't a Europe girl.

As she finished her thought the phone rang. Buffy picked up the receiver. "Hello?" silence on the other end told her it was another of what she considered a telemarketer recorded message there was always a good minute of silence before the recording kicked in. It took a whole three times to teach her to hang up before the recording kicked in._'I really need to get caller ID' _she sighed to herself as she started to hang up. Just in time to hear the click and then dial tone on the other end. "hmm" quickly hanging up and dialing 69.

"Hello Wolfram and Hart how may I direct your call" Harmony said

"Um." she said as she slowly recognized the voice. "Angel please." laughing as she said his name how childish of him to call and hang up on her.

"One moment." Harmony said "Boss line three."

"Got it Harm." Angel said. "Hello?"

"Angel you would think being as old as you are you could figure out how childish that was." Buffy said annoyed

"Huh, What, Buffy?" Angel said a little confused.

"You didn't just call me and hang up once you heard my voice like some love sick school boy?" Buffy said not convinced

"What? NO, why would I?" Angel said then it sunk in. "What would make you think I did or would do that?"

"I don't know maybe cause it happened and when I 69'd I got Wolfram and Hart office and to top it off Harmony's desk." Buffy said.

"I'm sorry Buffy I don't know who would of called you but it wasn't me."

"Oh."

"But while I have you on the line hows The Immortal?" Angel asked.

"Huh how you know about him?" Buffy asked

"I was kinda in Rome a week ago on some business and stopped by to see you but you were out Andrew told me about you seeing The Immortal."

"Oh well I was but I'm not anymore."

"Oh, sorry to hear that what happened?"

"He moved on and I grew up." Buffy said with a shrug.

"Ah. Well if there isn't anything else I have some things to get to nice talking to you Buffy." Angel said and hung up the phone. "Harm tell Spike I want to see him NOW!"

"Yes boss."

"You beckoned?" Spike said a few minutes later as he entered the office.

"Spike just let me ask you how old are you really? Nah I already know but that was well as Buffy put it childish."

"Buffy put it? Put what? You talked to Buffy?" Spike said running on.

"The phone call don't act stupid I didn't do it that leaves one person. I thought you didn't want her to know your alive now that she's seeing The Immortal?" Angel asked leaving out the part that she wasnt seeing him anymore.

"None of your business, Mate." Spike said leaving the room. 

Back in Rome Buffy has returned to her homework. Trying to push out of her mind who could of made that call. Not succeeding at changing her thoughts she decided to take a shower and head to bed. 

A bright blue light shoots up from the amulet, knocking a hole in the ceiling, going up through the floor of the Principal's office past Willow and through to the open sky. The light turns a warm orange color.

"Buffy!"

"Spike!"

Before Buffy can go to his side, the amulet refracts the orange light out into the hellmouth like rays of sunshine—but with concentrated intensity like a laser. Buffy stares at Spike. As the amulet works its magic, the Turok-Han are dusting throughout the hellmouth. The ground starts shaking. Faith calls out to the others.

"Everybody out, now!" Faith says. Everyone rushes to the stairs that lead up to the seal. Buffy runs to Spike's side.

Looking amazed he says "I can feel it, Buffy."

"What?" she asks

Spike says looking at her "My soul. It's really there. Kind of stings."

"Go on, then."

"No. No, you've done enough. You could still—"

"No, you've beat them back. It's for me to do the cleanup." The walls are crumbling around them.

Faith calls down to her "Buffy, come on!"

"Gotta move, lamb. I think it's fair to say school's out for bloody summer."

Worriedly she says. "Spike!"

"I mean it! I gotta do this." holds out his hand to stop her Lacing her fingers through Spike's, and they burst into flame together.

Softly, looking into his eyes "I love you."

Jerking awake in a panic like she had so many nights before she sighed. Would she ever stop dreaming about him Suddenly as there was a knock at the door she realized that the dream ended sooner then it usually did and the knock must of woken her up. "Yes?" Andrew walked in.

"Sorry to wake you but it's kind of important." He looked really scared at that moment.

Sitting up, and rubbing the sleep from her eyes. "Yeah whats up?"

"Well you kinda gotta promise not to kill me."

"What ever I promise." Buffy says annoyed and Andrews sits down in the chair next to her bed.

"Well you know that last night you went out with The Immortal?" Buffy nods. "Well someone or rather someones came by that night." Andrew says timidly

"Yeah I talked to Angel tonight he said he had been here. But who else?" Buffy asked questionly. _'Was the one who had called and hung up on her tonight?'_ she wondered to herself.

"Spike..." Buffy looked dumbstruck. "Spike is alive and he was here looking for you with Angel. And now both him and Angel are in trouble back in LA." The whole sentence came from him in less then half a second. He figured it was best to get it out fast.

"Spike?...Alive.." The tears came fast and soon she found she couldn't stop them she didn't even hear the part about him being in trouble just that he was alive. _'My Spike alive? Alive and didn't find me, how was this possiable?'_

"YES now snap out of it in two hours you and Willow have to be on a plane they need your help if they have any chance of surviving the coming fight." Andrew said slightly shaking Buffy.

"Surviving.. going die again?" Giving up Andrew slapped her across the face. "Ouch! Angel didn't tell me Spike was alive. why? Spike didn't come find me." She mumbled to herself.

"I didn't either I knew months ago when I went to get the rogue slayer he was there then. We all were just looking out for you and knew you go running after him and get hurt if you knew. As for Spike he well I don't know maybe he thought it was best for you I don't know and right now it doesn't matter do you hear me him and Angel will probably die in this fight without you and Willows help."

"What are they fighting?" Buffy asked snapping out of it and Andrew quickly filled her in on Angels plan to stall Wolfram and Hart even if it meant their lives and even if it was only a stall and not a stop.

"But with your help they may not die You took on the first and won what can be worse?"

"I didn't win, Spike won for us and I lost him." That wont happen again she swore to herself as she got up and quickly packed a bag. "Have you talked to Willow yet?" She asked as she finished and shut her suitcase.

Andrew nods. "She will meet you there at 5pm tomorrow." Not saying another word to him she walked out of the apartment and drove to the airport. On the plane ride she talked with Willow on their laptops. 

Willow: Can you believe it Spike alive, How tho?

Buffy: I don't know I didn't bother to ask Andrew he didn't feel the need to inform me months ago when he learned about it why would he tell me the truth now?

Willow: True 

Buffy: What I want to know is why Spike didn't get ahold of me. I know why Angel and Andrew didn't tell me I don't like the fact that they didn't but I understand, I however don't understand why Spike wouldn't.

Willow: I don't know either scared perhaps? 

Buffy: Of what? That he might get his way this time that I might admit how much he means to me instead of pushing him away.

Willow: No more like afraid he wont and you will push him away again.

Buffy having admited to Willow only what Spike had really meant to her to her surprise her best friend wasn't surprised and was very comforting about the whole thing even when no one else would of been. 

Buffy stunned and stopped typing and started to think about what Willow said. _'Did he really think, did he really believe I was lying when I told him I loved him, and that I would only push him away again?'_ "But I do love him" she said instead of thought. A couple people looked at her and smiled slightly. "Sorry" she mumbled. She wasn't exactly sure when it had happened but she did very much love him. For as long as she knew him they always faught, always tried to kill each other and both were more then cabable of the feat even if well matched. Had either of them had the intent of really killing the other the one would of won out she was sure of that. So from the many times of thinking about him sense he died on her she could only gather one thing, and that was they were meant to be they had obviously from the start felt something for the other why else wouldn't one of them compleated the act of killing the other? And why had they been so willing even way back then to work together? Before the chip before the soul before any of that they willing worked together to stop Angelus. Specialy on her side, after having her soulfull love of her life went all evil on her she trusted anough in Spike to work with him, A souless, evil vampire. The more she thought about it the more she realized it didn't matter when it happened at all just that she finally knew she loved Spike, loved him with all her heart, and that this time she wasn't going to lose him no matter what. 

Two hours later she arrived at the airport in LA. Exited the plane being greeted by Willow they hugged quickly and rushed out of the place.

"Uh boss.." Harmony didn't get any farther in her announcement before the doors to Angels office burst open. 

"Where is he?" Buffy demanded. 

"Well hello to you too Buffy...Willow. Where is who?" Angel asked 

"As if you don't know." Willow said looking annoyed. 

Quickly seeing the witches face he gave in. "He isn't here right now." 

"Where is he?"

"Lets just say he is out for proably the last time." Angel said angrily making it seem as he was really pissed at Spike. He raised the red jewel which flashed. "Well, he is out living his last day. That was a way to cloak the room so I could tell you what is going on." Which he did quickly. "Now you must go I wont have you here to die also." He said looking at Buffy. 

"Like hell, I'm not going anywhere." 

"You have to this is a suicide mission." 

"Not with us here." Willow chimed in. 

"I'm really not going get you to change your mind am I?" Buffy shook her head. "Fine" Angel said giving in. 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two Wesley, Spike and Gunn are sitting down when Angel, Buffy, and Willow arrive. Spike doesn't even look up for a sec and says. "So got that plan all ready boss?" mocking Angel. Wesley elbows Spike as he stares at Buffy. "Uh Buffy, Willow, What are you doing here?" Wes asks.

Spike jumps up. _'Oh my god what is she doing here how could Angel even dream of bringing them into a deadly battle like this?_ Spike thought to himself' "Uh Buffy?" As his face melts into the loving face she was so used to seeing.

_'He really is alive, the tears wailing in her eyes.' _Walking up to him placing a small kiss to his lips "That is for being alive." Then suddenly smacks him hard across the face. "And that is for not telling me." She said and walked back to Willow.

Getting his bearings Spike finally says. "You cant be here Luv. This is suicide for all of us here, We know it and I'm not going to allow.." Suddenly being cut off by Angel. "Don't bother Ive already tried the speech on them didn't work." Angel says. "Now sit back down." Spike sits down but doesn't take his eyes off Buffy. She is refusing to look at him.

Buffy and Willow are standing by the wall near the door while Angel paces the floor. Illyria is standing behind Wesley. Lorne is sitting on the edge of a table off to the side.

"This may come out a little pretentious, but... one of you will betray me." Spike raises his hands eagerly, ignoring Spike Angel says "Wes."

"Oh. " Spike says putting his hand down, then suddenly hopeful. "Can I deny you 3 times? " 

"Vail is the sorcerer of the bunch. You know that game. You've seen his place." 

((Vail walks into the dining room in his mansion, dragging his rack of IV drips with him.)) 

"He believes you'd make a play for my spot. " 

"That's not very flattering. " Wes says 

"It'll get you in the door. " Angel says then turns to Willow. "While I think Wes will be fine I'd like you there as back up soon as you hear the fight start get in there he won't be expecting anyone else let alone someone as powerful as you." Willow nods. "Illyria..."

((Four people walk out of a restaurant together, heading for a car parked along the street.)) 

"Izzerial the Devil and 3 other members of the circle dine together almost every night. " 

"I'll make trophies of their spines. " Illyria says 

"Good to have you on the team. Gunn. " 

"Yo. " Gunn says 

"Your friend Senator Brucker has a campaign office in west L.A. " 

((The Senator is talking on the phone in front of a large banner for her campaign.)) 

"You already know she's pure hellspawn, and she tends to surround herself with vampires. " 

"I was hoping it'd be vamps. I haven't dusted nearly enough this year. " looks to Spike "No offense. " 

"That's all right. " 

"Spike. " 

"Right. " Spike says standing up "First off, I'm not wearing any amulets. No bracelets, broaches, beads, pendants, pins, or rings. "

"Fine. All you need is a rattle. "

"Ah, the baby. "

"And a legion of the Fell Brethren. "

((Flashback to three of the Fell Brethren waiting in the lobby outside Angel's office before signing the contract to adopt the baby.))

I want the kid returned to his mother and the foster family dismembered. 

"Done and done. "

"Archduke Sebassis has over 40,000 demons at his command. "

((Archduke Sebassis is taking a bubble bath. His slave prepares a glass of Sebassis's favorite blue beverage by uncorking his vein and allowing his blood to fill the glass.))

"The other members of the council fear him. He's the key player, so he's mine. " Turning to Buffy. "You are coming with me."

"A world of no. Sorry I let him die once I'm going be there to make sure it doesn't happen again." Buffy says not even looking in Spikes direction. Angel just nods knowing he can't change her mind once its set even if it did tear at his heart to hear her choose Spike over him. Not noticing Spikes face go to a smirk and then to a very shocked look. _'Maybe I was wrong after all.'_ He thinks to himself. Angel turns to Lorne.

"Lorne..."

"Uh, I'm not a fighter, Angelwings. I never had the stomach for it. Looks like I'm your weak link. " 

"I just need you to back up Lindsey. "

"I still can't believe you brought him in. " Wes says

"He's part of this. It'll be just as dangerous for him as it will be for everyone else on our team." 

"So I guess we're not going back to the office after this. "

Shaking his head Angel says The alley just north of the Hyperion. Everyone who makes it meets there. If we do any damage at all, the senior partners are gonna rain hell on us. So be ready.

Pulling Angel aside he says. "Hey, Angel, uh, I'll do this last thing for you, for us... but then I'm out, and you won't find me in the alley afterwards. Hell, you won't find me at all. Do me a favor. Don't try." Lorne says and walks out.

Buffy and Willow walk out. Talking among themselves.

Wesley grabs his coat and walks toward the door with Gunn and Illyria.

"The day went by fast huh? " Gun says

"Try not to die. You are not unpleasant to my eyes. " Illyria says 

"Uh, thanks. You... try not to die, too. " shakes hands with Wesley "Later, then. " walking out. 

Wesley looks at Angel for a long moment before he walks out. Illyria follows. Spike and Angel are the only ones left in the apartment now.

Walking up to Angel "What do you think all this means for that Shanshu bugaboo? If we make it through this, does one of us get to be a real boy? " Spike says

Crossing his arms "Who you kidding? We're not gonna make it through. " Angel says 

"Well, long as it's not you. " Spike says shrugging. 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter Three Each fight went well surprisingly well. They looked a little beat up but nothing major, nothing they hadn't been through before. The Order of the Black Thorn was dead, their link to the seniors dead and now they all stood in the alley together watching the herds come in. 

Angel looks at the approaching crowd. It's hundreds, if not thousands, of demons of all sorts, shapes and sizes. A huge winged dragon flies angrily toward them overhead. 

"OK. You take the 30,000 on the left... " Gunn says 

"You're fading. You'll last 10 minutes at best. " Illyria says 

Standing he says "Then let's make 'em memorable. " 

Angel steps forward and Spike, Gunn and Illyria follow. Spike is standing off to Angel's right side. Buffy and Willow next to him. Angel is flanked a step behind by Gunn on the right and Illyria and Connor on the left. They stare at the horde of demons approaching them in the alley. 

"In terms of a plan? "

"We fight. "

"Bit more specific. "

Stepping forward "Well, personally, I kind of want to slay the dragon." the demon horde attacks "Let's go to work." swings his sword. They all rush in and as Angel wanted the dragon was toast quickly. The rest of the fight not so much they all did their thing taking one demon after another. Willow casting fireballs and stuns as Buffy swung her nifty axe/stake weapon she got during the battle with the first taking one head off after another. Angel and the others with their big swords. The Battle went on for hours. Wes got fatally wounded and Angel quickly dragged him off to a safer place. One by one the demons went down the gang were all pretty banged up but kept on fighting. With still about half to go the army suddenly dispersed literally disappearing in thin air and the gang all fell and just laid there not caring or worrying about why. Suddenly Angel jumped up 

"We have to get to Wes." Rushing off when he got to where he left him he realized he was no longer there. Looking around frantically he say the rest of the gang approach and noticed Illyria wasnt with them and breathed a sigh of relief. "Illyria didn't waste any time did she." 

"Guess not she was still there when, well when it ended." Gunn said shrugging. 

"Well I guess it's safe to say if they aren't here he must of still been alive she wouldn't of bothered otherwise. Let's go." They all rushed to the hospital. Once there found Wes who was in a coma but alive. The doctors insisted on patching them all up. Too bad they didn't know half of them would be healed quick enough anyhow. Back in the waiting room Angel spoke up.

"You know this isn't the end right?" They all nodded but Willow and Buffy. 

"What do you mean? We just killed twice as many demons then we have in sunnydale put together." Willow asked "How could we not be done?"

"Well there is the fact that if we didn't piss Wolfram and Hart off by killing off the Order we just killed half their army too they are going to want us dead even if it means doing it themselves, and when you add in they obviously pulled the rest out somehow makes it even worse. The way I figure it they wouldn't of pulled them out if they hadn't decided to take care of the problem themselves." Willow just nodded but Buffy chimed in. 

"How long do we have to recover you think before they come after us." 

"I'd reckon less then a day, Pet, probably a lot less." Spike said. Buffy just looked at him they fought this whole time together even during the order part and never said anything. _'And now there was more to come would she ever get a chance to really tell him how she felt?' _She wondered 

"He is probably right so, while I hate to leave Wes, we should get to preparing for this one." 

"Prepare? We just took on thousands of demons and we need to prepare for 3?" Willow asked 

"Well of course Red. I mean think about it these are the ones that had all those demons under their control. I reckon they are a little worse then them."

"Shall we then?" Illyria asked.

"Your not staying with him?" Angel asked her.

"No he'll be here when I'm done kicking ass." Angel nodded at her and they all got up and left. 

Back at the office Willow cloaked the room so they could discuss the battle ahead. "While this isn't the best place to be when Wolfram and Hart are after you its where our resources are so here we are." Angel said and began explaining what little he knew of Wolfram and Hart. "The name that is all I know if you break it up its their names Wolf, Ram, and Hart. We don't know if they are demons, higher beings or what but I can tell you for sure we are about to find out. So grab the best things you can find to defend yourself. We aren't waiting for them to come and get us they will have the upper hand then were going take that from them." Gunn nodded knowing what Angel meant...The White room. They all grabbed weapons and Willow grabbed her laptop and got in contact with the coven. Angel looked at her questioningly.

"Just grabbing a little more power so to speak." She said with a smile. After a few minute she stood up lit some candles and spoke some words very few of them understood. The room flashed and they all glowed slightly before dimming back again.

"OK what the bloody hell was that Red?" Spike asked

"Oh just a new trick I learned. You ones with excellerated healing already just got a boost and us without just got some." Willow said with a smile.

"Bloody hell women we couldn't of got that hours ago?" Spike asked 

"Actually no, the Coven didn't feel we needed it then. They do now. So evidently they agree with Angel that these guys are a lot worse."

"Great" Spike said before brighting up a bit. "So how much excellerated?" 

"Not sure exactly well just have to wait a see I guess." Willow said. "Ready?" They all went in to the elevator and Gunn sent them to the white room.

"Damn that's bright." Buffy said. Angel nodded and lead the gang into the room. Then looked at Gunn. 

"Well here we go. The black cat was killed awhile ago but with Wolfram and Hart around nothing stays that way. So anyhow me and the cat sorta have a understanding." Suddenly a really big black cat was standing next to him He bent down and next thing they all knew their was a door on the other side of the room. "Let's do this then." Gunn said and lead the way. After about 20 minutes of walking they came to another door. Walking though it, into a black room. 

"I guess were here." Buffy said. Noticing she wasnt the only one that seen the 3 normal looking men standing in front of them.

"I see they." The first one said. "Found us." The second one said. "Good for them." The third one said. Buffy rolled her eyes. "Finishing each others sentences how cute." 

"Oh but." first said "its more" second said "then that dear" third said "child. We are." firsts said "one. Don't" second said "you see" the last one just laughed. Suddenly they merged into what kinda looked like a totem with arms and legs on the top was the Wolf head bellow it was the ram head and bellow that was the hart's head. And just as suddenly came together it broke apart again. The gang rushed them. Angel, Connor, and Gunn on the Wolf, Buffy and Spike on the Ram and Illyria on Willow on the Hart.

Angel, Connor, and Gunn swung their swords and the Wolf knocked them right out of their hands and across the room. They charged at him knocking him down and began beating his face in. He quickly swung his arm again and they went flying across the room blood dripping from them. Gunns wounds stopped bleeding almost immediately while Angel and Connors just disappeared. "Nice spell, Willow." Gunn yelled as he jumped up, grabbed his sword and charged agian Angel right behind him. 

In the mean while, Buffy and Spike were hacking their sword and axe at the ram who now wore the face of the ram blood dripping down his head. But he healed quickly too. "Great no advantage there." Buffy said and began hacking at him harder. 

Illyria and Willow made quick work on the Hart Willow first tried a stun which he broke from quickly but didn't see Illyria as she knocked him back across the room. Willow tossed fireball after fireball at him as Illyria beat his head in. Quickly Willow magically threw her axe at him cutting his head off which rolled across the ground to land at her feet. "Lets get to it then" Illyria said and began to chop his body up Willow did the same to his head. "Hey Buff go for the head." 

"I am duh." 

"No no I mean cut it off." She yelled at her. Angel and Gunn heard and they both hacked at his neck at the same time from different sides. But their weapons were thrown away agian. "Damn it." Gunn yelled as he jumped on the Wolf. Illyria coming up behind the ram and and sending him and Gunn across the room. Buffy and Spike were still going at the Ram when Willow joined them. Distracting the Ram as Buffy and Spike chopped off his head. 

"To pieces" Willow said and they began to chop him up. 

"NO!" The wolf yelled as he slowed time. 

"Hi..gh..er...be...ing...th..en." Spike said slowly looking at Illyria as that's a power she had. 

"You may have killed the Ram and the Hart but you will not get the best of me." Suddenly growing three times his size, and changing into a full wolf. Just as the time slow broke he charged at Angel. The rest came running jumping, and hacking, and punching at him. All being thrown back as he continued to go for Angel. Who to the Wolfs dismay was more then ready sword in hand. As the Wolf got close Angel began to swing in one fast motion he took the wolfs head off. 

Once he was in bits they put the piles together and Spike set fire to it. "They are so not coming back." Buffy said before she collapsed. The spell healed her but didn't keep her from exhaustion. Spike picked her up and they left the black room and returned to Angel's office. Illyria left for the hospital before anyone even sat down. Spike laid Buffy on the couch.

"Let her rest." Willow said sinking into a chair. Spike nodded and took a seat also next to Connor. Angel sat behind his desk. and Gunn just sunk to the floor.

"We did it we really did." Angel said

"You do know what this means don't you?" Gunn asked and Angel shook his head. "You really own Wolfram and Hart. Whats the first order of business Boss?"

"Change the name." He said and they all laughed. 


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four "You're really going back?" Buffy asked Willow as they waited in the Lobby for Willows ride. Willow nodded 

"Well what would the new slayers do without me?" She laughed. 

"True I don't know what I would of done without you." She said then hugged Willow. "Well if you must go please keep in touch and make sure to give all those girls at the academy a good lesson for me. "Fight the fight but don't forget who the good ones are and don't forget to tell them how this fight would of went without the vamps." She said and laughed Willow hugged her agian and got up and walked out the door. "Don't be to hard on him, Buff he does really love you." She turned, looked past Buffy and said before walking out the door. Buffy smiled and turned to see him standing behind her. Suddenly her face got angry and she walked past him. 

"We need to talk luv." Spike said. 

"Now we need to talk? You have been alive for months and now we need to talk? Don't think it works that way." She said in a huff and walked off._'Who does it think he is, demanding we talk.'_ He quickly followed her and put his arms around her from behind.

Whispering in her ear. "I'm sorry luv. I wanted to and I even tried that's when I found out my ghost form was stuck here." She turned to face him.

"Ghost form? Huh?"

"Ah no one filled you in?" He turned and led them to the seats in the waiting room and quickly explained to her about the ghost him and how he got back. She brushed her hand down his cheek. _'What am I doing, I'm still mad at him.'_ Quickly withdrew it and got up.

"But once you could leave you didn't come so it still doesn't work that way. I love you Spike but obviously you didn't love me enough." She said her back to him and then she left the room leaving him there._ 'but I do more then I have ever loved anyone, oh why didn't I go to her?'_ he asked himself._ 'Wait'_ his mind screamed at him, _'she said she loved you, and you weren't dieing. She loves you, you bloody git.' _He got up and ran after her. He found her outside Angel office.

"You don't want to go in there, Pet."

"And why not?" She said turning towards him.

"Because you, bloody hell, because you love me and damn it just cause I didn't go find you doesn't mean I don't love you it means that I do and was well bugger I was scared, that..that you just push me away agian. And besides he moved on he is with some bloody werewolf now." He said nodding to Angel's office. 

_'Like I would actual go there again. I don't love Angel'_"Your a dope, and a bonehead and your shirty." Reusing the words she had used shortly before he died on her.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean." Cracking a smile as he relived the moment. 

"You didn't believe me.." Suddenly he began to glow and then fell to the ground knocked out. Buffy rushed to him pulling his upper body to her. "Why now, no." She sobbed Angel heard the crash and came running out of his office. 

"What the..." he stopped as he seen her sitting there crying holding lifeless Spike in her arms. "What the hell is going on and why are you crying he is a vampire he is obviously not dead. err well not gone anyway." Buffy looked up as the words sunk in not gone, not dust. He didn't leave her again he just well .. She wasn't sure. 

"What the hell is wrong then." 

"Just my luck." Angel said with a sigh. 

In the informatory Spike layed still lifeless on the table Buffy, Angel and the rest of the gang stood around as the doctor poke around Spike.

"Oh just check his damn pulse." Angel said frustrated. Everyone looked at him Gunn and Wes who was fully recovered now understood what he meant and got sad looks on their faces for Angel. 

However Buffy and the doctor looked at Angel confused. "Angel have you lost your mind Spike's a vampire he doesn't have a pulse."

"Well if I'm correct he isn't a vampire any longer, therefor he will have a pulse and if he does then well know he will be fine just out of it for awhile." Angel said more calm now then before. Having worked it out with himself. Nina was a werewolf she would live forever also he couldn't go dieing on her and well Buffy as much as he hated to admit it was in love with Spike and human and would die on Spike eventually it only made sense that he should become human agian so they could be happy also. Sulking as he thought it. Spike won he gets to become human and he gets Buffy. The doctor gave in and checked Spikes pulse. Getting wide eyed he said. "He has one and its normal." Quickly checking his bp. "Normal." Buffy just stood there. _'Spike human. My Spike really alive.' _She couldn't believe her ears. "Looks like Angel here was right, Spike is human and going to be just fine when he wakes up. Mind filling us in on why? As you obviously knew this would happen." 

Angel filled them in on the story, Buffy still not saying a word. He walked over to her and shook her. "Snap out of it would you. You got what you wanted, Spike and your normal life is just around the corner, be happy. Only way I can take this is if you are happy." Angel said and then walked out of the room. To call Nina. Who was on a plane back home shortly after they hung up.

Buffy sat and watched Spike sleep for hours that day. Wondering what he would be like as human, wondering if he would still love her. About 8 hours after he fell he woke up slowly. Seeing Buffy setting next to him her head bowed in her hands and looking sad.

"What's wrong luv?" He asked making her jump up.

"Your awake!" She said throwing her arms around him

"And here I thought I was still asleep." He said hugging her. "That doesn't explain why you were crying, vampire remember if i'm not dust I'm not gone." Buffy sat down on the bed next to him.

"I'm not sure how you are going take this, But I have to tell you something." He just nodded and waited. "Your not a vampire anymore Spike."

"Have you bloody lost your mind pet?"

"No you really aren't a vampire anymore."

"Well that's bloody great! That teach that know it all." Buffy smiled. 

She hugged him _'I'm human, and here is my Buffy hugging me, holding me, loving me, my Slayer. Human a bloody human, I'm a bloody human.' _His thoughts drifted _'But is that what I really want?'_ Thinking back to when he was human._ 'I was a bloody pathetic human. Weak, stupid human. But he couldn't be that again could he?' 'Of course you can William the bloody awful poet, the bloody awful human.' _his mind yelled back at him. _ 'How can I protect Buffy let alone love her the way she deserves as a bloody human?' _Suddenly he pulled from her embrace and smiled softly at her.

"Everything OK?" She asked _'I don't know why I didn't realize before but now it doesn't matter. I know now and here we are.'_ "I love you." she said when Spike didn't speak. 

"I love you too." Spike said. _ 'Bloody hell, shes beautiful.'_ Gently he kissed her, held her in his arms. _ Great, I really am a ponce. The old Spike would of had her halfway undressed by now and what am I doing? Just holding her.'_

Before she could give it much thought she had increased the intensity of the kiss, more passionate, bringing their bodies closer. "I need you Spike." she whispered before tearing at his clothes. 

**AN: It's Spuffy cant be that easy now can it:)**


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five They were still laying in each others embrace when the doctor came to check on Spike. Softly tapping on the door. "Just a sec." Buffy yelled as she jumped up and gathered her clothes. Spike quickly replaced his clothes just as Buffy let the doctor in.

"Just wanted to see if the patient was awake yet. Good I see you are." The doctor went through the normal checkup routine. "You seem to be doing very well Spike. Your free to go when ever your ready." Spike just nodded and Buffy thanks the doctor.

Climbing back on the bed next to Spike, Buffy wrapped her arms around him. "I love you." She whispered in his ear. Feeling free at last. _'Why did I ever even think twice back then about loving him. It was never just sex, no matter how much I tried to make myself believe it was. I love this man.'_

Slowing breaking the embrace. "I love you too." Spike said quietly as he got up from the bed and heading to the bathroom. _'What am I going do now? I can't stay with her, unlike her so called friends I can't make her worry about me too and put herself in more danger for me, Just so I can feel needed and pretend like I am actually helping her. Bloody hell what have I done? Sleeping with her all the while knowing I can't stay._' Spike thought shaking his head as he shut the bathroom door and leaned against it. 

_'That was odd.'_ Buffy thought as she got up from the bed and got herself together. They would be leaving the informatory soon. _'But where would they go? Neither had a home here, and both their homes in Sunnydale were gone. '_

Spike emerge from the bathroom. Stood there watching Buffy in deep thought._'She is so beautiful, Isn't this what I always wanted for her to admit she loved me? So why am I about to run?' _he asked himself. _'You know why you ponce, You can't be with her now. It's not save.'_ His mind yelled back at him. "Luv..." he started then thought better of it. "I'll be going then."

"You'll?" _ 'Not we'_ "Your leaving?"

"I wont be any help to the super gang here. Or you" Spike said the last part lower then the rest. "So yes guess I am." He said and before she could even process what he had said he walked out of the room. From behind the closed door, outside the room he heard her say something. 

"Won't be any help? Is that all he is thinking about?" She said barely above a whisper _ I love him, isn't that enough? Please don't do this Spike. _

_ Sorry luv, I have no choice. _ He thought to himself before he walked away and out of the building not stopping to talk to anyone.

_'But you do have a choice..'_ She thought as she began to cry. _ ' No I won't cry for him any more. I won't, I've cried more then my fair share of over the last few months. Maybe I can just pretend He didn't come back.'_ "Yeah right." 

_'Bloody hell, I'm going have to get a job.'_ Spike thought to himself as he walked away from the only good thing in his current life.

**A/N: For anyone who hasn't figured it out yet, Anything in italic is the persons thoughts. Anything with just ' around ' the thought only they can hear. In this chapter I added a small twist as you see. The around certain thoughts says that the other could hear it, but doesn't at this point know it was thoughts they heard. Sorry for the short chapter It was basically a filler I changed a bit of the story I had planned so I had to put this in to get back to where I was I am hoping you are enjoying the story thus far and please leave feedback if you are. The one I did get so far thanks much helped me get to the next chapter. :) **


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter Six "Well I'm sure the hell not going back to Rome, just not sure what I am going to do now. " Buffy said into the phone. On the other end Willow proceeded to try and cheer her up.

"I'm sorry Buffy, I don't know what you should do either but hanging around Angel's law firm isn't exactly best for you either. Being there your bound to run into him, I'm betting he didn't leave the city." 

"True, but then agian I kinda wanna run into him." Buffy said. "I know I shouldn't when he came back he didn't even tell me and soon as he became human he ran off, think that more then covers what I need to know but still, I love him." A sorry to interrupt cough came from behind.

her. "I'll call you later Willow." She said and hung up. Turning around and facing Angel. "Yes?" 

"I don't know if you want to hear it or even willing but maybe you should take off, you know." 

"Yeah maybe." Buffy said head down. Angel melted. 

"I'm sorry I can't help it, Of course you shouldn't. Go find him. Gotta remember he was a dopey love sick vampire and he was even worse as a human. Knowing him, which by the way I do we may of hated each other but I still know him, His only thought is keeping you safe and doesn't figure hanging around for you to have to watch over is the way to do it." 

"You think that's all it is?" 

"Buffy as much as I hate to admit it Spike loves you, really loves you. You know this so why are you asking me?" He was right and she quickly picked her head up and took off. Yelling behind her a quick thanks to Angel. 

Across town Spike hadn't come any closer to figuring out what to do with himself. He just wanted to run back to Buffy. Instead he was sitting in the sleaziest bar in town downing a pitcher of beer all by his lonesome. Every so often a stray girl would stop and try to make conversation with him which he rightfully ignored till the girl went away.

He started wondering how he was going to pay the bill for the drinks he knew he wouldn't be able to just walk out, had no money and being human now he couldn't just beat up the bartender and then leave. So the next girl who set down got hit on and worked like a charm she covered his bill shortly after he agreed to go elsewhere with her. Not exactly what he had in mind but she should be easy enough to ditch. They walked out the back door of the bar and she immediately jumped him. Kissing his neck and running her hands over his body. He quickly pushed her back. "Sorry not going happen." he said and turned to leave. He heard a familiar change just before she spoke. 

"That's OK lover, I'll take what I can get." she said as she reached to bite down on him. He grabbed her arm and tossed her over him and flat on her back in front of him.

"This is just to easy." He said just before shoving the stake into her and she dusted not giving it or her another thought. Just then he knew she was near. Knew his Buffy was close, wasn't sure how but he knew. So he took off towards where he knew she had to be. Which is where he found her walking towards him. She spotted him walked right up to him and punched him square in the face. "Shit women what the bloody hell was that for?" Spike asked holding his nose. But before she could answer he got pissed and as natural as you please swung at her hitting her jaw. 

"For leaving me!" She shouted at him as she punched him agian this time hitting him on his arm as he blocked her. Spike swung at her agian and she blocked him. Back and forth they fought throwing punches and blocking when they were able. They were both looking a little beat up, when he finally got her backed against a wall and before either of them knew what was happening his lips crashed into hers hard, with such wanting and need. Soon they were tearing at each others clothes. As Spike grinded himself onto her body through their jeans. She was moaning as he threw her to the ground and ripped her shirt from her. Seeing her laying there before him he snapped out of it and stood up. What the bloody hell was he thinking? He couldn't do this agian, no matter how much he wanted too. He couldn't be with her now. 

"What the..?" Grabbing her shirt what was left of it and walking towards him. 

"Sorry luv, I..I can't." He said before he disappeared from the alley. _'Bloody hell what is wrong with me? Why do I keep leaving her now that I finally have her, now that it isn't a dream? You already know the answer to that mate. You love her too much to see her hurt because of your ponce ass.' _ Sighing deeply he continued to walk. 

Buffy just stood there for a moment wondering what the hell just happened._ 'I won't cry I won't'_ her mind yelled at her. _ 'Nor will I let him continue to do this to me.'_ She knew deep down that she probably deserved it after all she had put him through over the years. But damn if she was going sit and take it like he did. No sirree. He would either get his shit together and come back to her on his own or she would just have to do without him. No matter how much it hurt to do so. She wasn't about to let him keep doing this to her. Quickly she put the remains of her shirt on and left the alley in the other direction. 

Months went by as Buffy established a life in LA. She got a part time job at a local gym. What better to suit a slayer, and it paid well too, more then enough to cover her bills of her small loft apartment. Then add in what she made at Angel Law Firm / Help the Helpless. The gang was great about it when she asked to join. Even seeing Angel and Nina didn't bother her. She was actually quite happy for them. So she had her new life and while it wasn't completely normal it was as close as she could ever expect. Feeling lonely alot of the time, and missing Spike made her keep busy but it was better that way. As the more she worked the more she was able to save and the more she could help Dawn with her collage needs. Dawn had decided to stay in Rome and finish school. But promised to move to LA once she was finished. Life had gotten as good as Buffy could expect for herself, which over all wasn't too bad. Just one thing was missing..

Spike on the other hand while wasn't bad off wasn't doing as good. He fought with himself daily about leaving Buffy. But he now had himself a nice little job. Which actually came as a surprise to him. One night he was at a bar when he bumped into a guy almost twice his size the guy being drunk took offense to the action and pretty much drug Spike out of the building and started trying to beat the crap out of him. Lucky for Spike the guy was very drunk and Spike had all those years of fighting behind him. He easily blocked the guys attacks and returned them beating him up pretty good. To Spike's good fortune the guy was more then pleased to get the shit kicked out of him for once and offered Spike a audition at his studio he was working on a fighting flick and thought Spike was more then perfect for the part. Being his first part and a really downscale flick it didn't pay great but got him some money and he found a nice, small apartment near where he was hanging at the time, which just happened to be clear across town from Angel's and only a small chance he would run into any of them on a daily basis. He was offered a couple small parts after completing the first which looked a little more promising. But he noticing himself becoming more and more like the Angel he knew when he was at Wolfram and Hart all brooding. He spent all his time off work, either at the bar down the street of sulking in his apartment.

Later that week Spike found himself sitting at the bar downing a few drinks. When he was suddenly interrupted but a familiar voice behind him. The demon wasn't talking to him but he would know that voice anywhere. Quickly tossing a twenty on the counter for his drinks he got up and went towards the voice. "Clem!" Spike yelled over the music as he approached his old friend.

"Spike? Spike is that really you? I heard you were back but never in my life would I have actually believed it till now! How you been Buddy?" They hugged quickly and Clem looked towards a empty table and they made their way to it. 

"Been better but I'm alive and kicking so.. How about you?" 

"Doing great, myself. So you just have to tell me what happened." Spike went over the last year in detail. Explaining how he died how he came back as a ghost how he and the gang saved the world agian big time. "Oh and I finally had the one thing I've always wanted and then I left her." 

"Huh and Huh?" Clem said in confusion. 

"Well I never really told you, I'm not even sure why as you would of probably been the only person I would of told. But I'm in love with the Slayer, With Buffy."

"Well duh any duffius could see that. But what happened?" 

"Well back then we went back and forth. I loved her for what seemed like forever. And we had something going for awhile and then her good basically forced her to stop it to tell me she didn't love me and she was using me and she could never love a soulless vampire. That I was just confident. Then I proved her right by hurting her. That's the last time I remember seeing you. When I left. That was the night I hurt her. I left to get my soul and I did. I, a vampire fought for my soul and won. I came back to sunnydale a crazed mess redden with guilt and to top it off the first was after me making it's lap dog having me do things, kill people and I didn't even know. There was a trigger the first used and we broke it. Me and Buffy got closer, became friends never lovers agian but really close friends. She finally admitted she needed me and I meant something to her. And then I died saving the world. That moment she told me she loved me for the first time and I didn't believe her I died not believing her. And when I came back at first I tried to go to her and couldn't due to being stuck at Wolfram and Hart. By the time I could leave agian I decided not to go to her. Was too afraid she would push me away agian. Then during our plan to hurt Wolfram and Hart she found me, fought by my side and we won agian. We, I believe started to get what we had back when I collapsed and when I woke I was human. My old ponce self. And instead of being happy and staying with her I left. Only thing I could think of was keeping her safe and I couldn't do that by being with her, as a stupid human who wouldn't be any help to her." Spike words ran on and on. He downed his drink before changing the subject. "So there you have it. So what have you been up to this last year?" 

Clem just laughed. "You idiot, and don't change the subject. You're a idiot!" Clem repeated. 

"Hey now wait just a minute with the name.."

"No I wont wait. You are a bloody idiot." Clem repeated agian with a word Spike had rarely if ever heard him use. "What makes you think after over a hundred years as a vampire you would be just your old self agian? What could possibly be going on in that head of yours to make you think you would just lose all that? Sure maybe you don't have super strength anymore maybe no super smell and hearing but damn if you lost the fighting skills you learned over the years. Nothing could make you just what you once were. Not to mention I highly doubt that Buffy gives a damn about all that. Oh and by the way remember I was there after you left to get your soul. I seen Buffy and even back then she loved you. Even after you hurt her she loved you. Sure she tried to put up a front when I told her you were gone but demon remember I can sense things like that and that's what it was a front. What the hell is wrong with you two anyway! I have seen you go back and forth for years for more then you even realize." Clem said throwing his arms in the air as he got up and got another drink. Spike sat there in thought till Clem sat back down. "I just can't believe you guys haven't figured it out by now. How many years has it been sense you first met? Seven, eight? And you still don't get it?" Clem smacked Spike in the back of the head and Spike looked up. 

"What the bloody.." 

"No just pay attention would you! Ever heard of destiny, fate? There is such a thing you know. And believe me when I tell you it plays a major roll in the life you two have and should have. Let me ask you something. The first time you two met what happened?"

It made Spike laugh thinking about it. "We talked as I remember, or rather threats to each other." 

"And that was just the start what about the first time you fought? Neither one of you died or even came close. Why do you think that is? And exactly how long did it take you to start helping her? I wasn't there then but I can bet it was before all the chip nonsense." Spike just nodded remember the night he came to her offering help in the Angelus situation. "Must I really knock some sense into you Buddy?" Clem finished got up and walked out the door leaving a somewhat stunned Spike sitting at the table alone. 


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter Seven Buffy was going about her usual daily activities, Work at the club, lunch and then off to the office to see which new big bad was about. When she entered the meeting she was surprised to find the room empty and dark. As she turned on the lights she was greeted by literally everyone she knew jumping from behind furniture shouting at her. 

"SURPRISE, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BUFFY!" Suddenly a banner was lowered which said it also. She had been so caught up in everything else in her life she had forgotten her own birthday. She started laughing uncontrollably. Everyone looking at her like she was crazy she finally calmed down. 

"Sorry all just.. Well you wouldn't believe just how big of a surprise this is. I had kinda forgotten what day it was." They all joined in then laughing with her. She was quickly embraced by her sister and then Giles, followed by Willow and Kennedy, Then Angel and Gunn, And lastly Xander who she hadn't seen sense they parted outside sunnydale. "It's so great to see you all. I've missed you so much!" Illyria, Wes and Connor came through the door carrying a very large cake and they all began to sing. As they all sat down to eat. Buffy noticed the looks between her younger sister and the human vampire son she had only just learned about a few months before. Still hadn't grasped it all but accepted it and liked the boy. But it was making her uneasy with the looks she was seeing. But before she could give it much thought Angel announced it was time for presents. Angel and Nina had gotten her beautiful picture of a wolf. Buffy giggled a bit at that one. 

"Well couldn't resist really." Nina commented. 

Gunn, Wes, Connor, and Giles had all gotten her appliances of some sort of another for her new apartment. Illyria had gotten her a new sword. Xander had made her a new weapons trunk sense the first one he made got destroyed in the battle with the first. Dawn had gotten her plane tickets for anytime to come see her. Smiling at her sister she noticed there was one more gift and no one left it could of came from. It was a small box and she looked questionly at everyone who shook their heads in that unknowing way. Careful ripping the paper from the small box as she opened it. It was a small heart-shaped locket with a little cross in the middle of the heart. She turned in over in her hands a few times then spotted the markings on the back. Which said. 'With love.' There was only one person she knew it could of came from and it made her heart skip a beat. She quickly opened the locket, On the inside she found two small pictures one of her and one of human Spike. Looking like his usual self smirk firmly placed on his face. She felt the tear roll down her cheek. Angel promptly tried to get everyone's attention but only the ones that already knew paid attention everyone else was worried and quickly began gathering around her. Before she could snap it shut Xander had seen. 

"For Christ sake! Even in death he..." 

"He's not dead." Buffy said quietly interrupting. 

"What do you mean he's not dead!" Xander shouted. Buffy sighed. 

"Xander please." Willow pleaded. 

"So what? Who cares he still butting in your life." Xander said to Buffy ignoring Willow. 

"This is Buffy's life and I don't think you should be butting in either." Angel said standing. 

"I know its Buffy's life, the reason I'm saying it he needs to stay out of it." 

"Xander just calm down." Giles said still not sure on the whole matter himself but could tell he needed to be supportive to Buffy. 

"But.." Xander started.

"Please just stop." Buffy said barely above a whisper. 

"Why? Your not seriously thinking about this are you!" Xander shouted agian. 

"I love him." Buffy agian said softly. Xander looked dumbfounded for a moment. 

"That's just great. Just damn great." He said throwing his hands up and turning away. 

"STOP IT JUST STOP IT." She shouted at him standing up. "I love him and damn if I care what anyone thinks anymore. I loved him back then and I love him now and for the damn record he is human now not that, that is any of your damn business. Did I say anything when you fell in love with Anya? " Xander cringed at the mention of her name. "Did I tell you to stop loving her when she became a demon agian? No I bloody well didn't, and I supported you least till I thought I had to kill her , and do I really need to bring up the fact that I killed Angel again and even after the trying to kill her I still supported you. I'm Sorry Xander maybe I shouldn't of said that but damn it Don't I deserve the understanding of my closest friends! I can't have the man I love but the least I can hope for my friends to at least be supportive and maybe give a damn what I want." She shouted at him. 

Xander crumbled. "I'm sorry Buff, really I am but he hurt you! Do you not remember that?" 

"Yes I remember that, But I also remember him loving me and me being cruel and heartless to him and pushing him to that point and for some stupid reason I thought I couldn't possibly love him and because I thought he wasn't capable of love being a soulless vampire but I was wrong on both accounts, He didn't need his soul to love me or to love period. I told you before Xander he knew what he did was wrong and he hurt from it also and he went and fought to near inch of his life to get a damn soul because of it. Which in turn made him crazy. Yet through it all he still loved me and be damned I loved him. Then I lost him in the battle and when I finally thought I had him back he was made human and tore from me agian. And I am done arguing rather I should or shouldn't love him. I shouldn't have to not with one of my best friends. Not with you! Specially sense none of this matters he is gone, I don't know what this means but he isn't here and I just need him here." She said waving the necklace about before collapsing into Xander's waiting arms.

"I'm sorry Buffy. I'm so sorry.. I had no idea." He said as he held her. Everyone else just stood around not knowing what to say or do. But Angel sensed something and started to leave the room as Spike walked in said nothing and walked up behind Xander carefully tapping his shoulder. Xander gave him a dirty look but stepped out of the way and Spike took his place. 

"I'm here now luv." He said and everyone filed out of the room quietly. "I'm here." 


	8. Chapter 8

Not even realizing the change she softly sobbed into what she thought was Xander's chest.  
_'Why am I doing this to myself..or better yet why is he doing this to me? Sending me  
such a present after not only disappearing on me but telling me that there was no us.'_  
"I just love him so much.." she softly whispered as she continued to sob.

"I'm here now luv, I'm here." Spike repeated and Buffy jumped clear out of his arms nearly  
knocking herself on her ass.

"What.." cutting herself off before she asked what he was doing there. "Where did everyone go?  
When did everyone go?" _Not to mention, the fact of how I came to be in your arms when I  
fell into Xanders._

Smirking, "I guess everyone felt awkward once I came in and left, which was about 15 minutes ago  
and I exchanged places with Xander only moments after your collapse."

"But how did you exchange places without..Woh wait a minute, I never asked that part..least not out loud."  
Buffy said becoming very nervous. _'Oh my god, oh my god..'_ was all she could think.

"Huh? But I heard you ask what do you mean you didn't ask it out loud?" A confused Spike asked raising his brow.

"I uh .." Buffy started but not believing it herself felt awkward saying it. "Well I'm pretty sure I thought it."  
_no no I know I thought it, what the hell is going on?_

_What the bloody hell is she going on about, Think it my ass, I bloody well heard her ask it._

"I am going on about how your able to read my damn mind. What the hell is that about, and you didn't hear me ask  
it you heard me think it!"

"Now hold on a damn minute..You are obviously the one reading minds here." _'Now then how did this happen?'_  
Waiting for her to respond he got nothing. _I said how did this happen?_Trying harder for her to hear him.

_'How the heck should I know.'_ When she noticed Spike still waiting on a answer she tried agian. _How the  
hell should I know?_

"I think it only happens when we try or think things we want the other to hear or rather we normally would of just said."

"OK this is just creepy and we still don't know why." Buffy said. There was a soft knock at the door.

"Buffy are you OK?" Giles asked as he opened the door slightly.

"Yeah, I think. Come on in Giles." He walked in the room looking kinda nervous. "It's OK really, I think tho  
I think I know how to make you more comfortable if ya up for some research." She said with a smile.

"You know I am what's up?"

"Well we seem to have a slight problem." She said glancing at Spike who stood being way to quite. "Or rather  
a odd thing." Looking a little confused she continued. "It seems me and Spike can now sort of send mind  
messages to each other."

Looking rather confused himself. "Mind messages..Care to elaborate for me?"

"She means we can hear each others thoughts, but only when when we try to let the other hear." Spike said with a shrug.

"Ahh Thank you Spike. How and why I guess would be for me to research I assume?" Buffy nodded at him. "Very well then  
I'll grab Wes and we will get right on this, You know where to find us of course." Giles said with a nod and left the  
room. As he exited the room Xander and Dawn entered.

"Hi guys."

"Everything OK Buff?" Xander asked

"I'm not sure. But I think so." Spike looked like he was about to leave the trio. _ I am so not done with you don't  
you even think about walking out that door._ "Would you guys mind giving us a few more minutes?" They nodded and  
left the room.

"Touchy, I wasn't leaving leaving you know." Spike said as he walked closer to her wrapping his arms around her. "Say it  
agian..." Spike asked

"I love you." She said knowing what he wanted.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't of le.." Buffy cut him off

"I know you shouldn't have." Pushing him playfully. "But least you know that now." She said with a bright smile as they  
embraced. "Just don't leave me again."

"Demons couldn't drag me away." He said and then kissed her deeply. Pulling away he reached for her hand taking the  
necklace from her and putting it around her neck to do the clasp.

"It's beautiful, thank you." Spike smiled and pulled her close kissing her forehead then her nose and finally her lips.  
Deepening the kiss as they wrapped their arms around each other. Reluctantly Buffy pulled away. "We probably outta let  
everyone know, everything is OK." Spike nodded and they left the room still holding each other.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter Nine

"Well this seems pretty pointless, doesn't it." Giles stated aloud

"Maybe we can just do some tests on them and figure outthat way?" Wes suggested

"Maybe we wont have to." Giles stated while finishing the page he was on. Then getting up and rushing out of the room Wes hot on his tail.

Down the hall in another room the gang were all sitting around talking, when giles and wes came in.

"We need to know exactly what went on down there the last few minutes before Spike burned up." Both Buffy and Spike looked like it was the last thing in the world they wanted to talk about but Buffy spoke up anyhow quickly going through there last minutes together.

"...And then I grabed his hand and they both burst into flames."

"Stop there." Giles interupted her. "Thats all I need. It would seem.." He said as he looked at the pages of the book agian. "That in that moment you both well kinda stole some of the others soul. Just a small piece but anough for weird things to happen."

"So I have part of Spike soul in me...and he of mine?"

"Pretty much.."

"Wow"

"OMG"

"Come agian?"

"Cool"

The room busted out with comments from everyone on the matter. But Spike and Buffy just locked gazes. Wow now thats a little strange. Buffy thought to Spike.

Bloody hell its more then strange...I now have part of my slayer in me.

That just sounds weird Buffy giggled Two souls become one, I don't think they mean it literaly besides the fact that we didn't get married...Uhh I mean.. Buffy tried to back peddle but it was too late.

Married? No I don't suppose we did but we may as have did. So umm..Why don't we?

Why don't we what?

Buffy Ann Summers marry me. Buffy squeaked and the whole room turned to her.

"Of course I will." She said aloud and threw her arms around Spike. "I love you."

"Huh?"

"What?"

"Whats that all about?"

"Come agian?"

"Spike just asked me to marry him..and I said yes!" Buffy squeaked agian. Spike's grin couldn't get any bigger.

"Congradulations"

"Huh?"

"Come agian?"

"Just shut up all of you!" Buffy said as he got up and pulled Spike out of the room. "You mean it?" Spike nodded

"Of course I mean it. Your all I bloody think about, dream about, Im drowning in you Summers."

This time the words made Buffy smile brightly and throw her arms around her fiancee Mrs Spike She giggled "That sounds funny."

Actualy it would be Mrs William Dyltor

The End


End file.
